Archive for April, 2016

Top Three Reasons Why People Get Divorced

Saturday, April 23rd, 2016
  1. The “fire” in the relationship goes out. For whatever reason, it is common that the intimacy in the relationship becomes strained, and over time it seems to disappear. Although a healthy sex life with your spouse doesn’t guarantee a successful marriage, it still significant since it provides security for both partners, and without it, stress and resentment can build. When the intimacy in a marriage expires, spouses grow apart and things like infidelity and separation are almost a certainty. It doesn’t mean that you are a bad person; it is just simple human nature. Men need a good sex life with their partners to feel romantic, and at the same time, women also need a certain amount of romance in order to want sex and feel, well, sexy.
  1. Financial problems and differences. Although financial problems can put serious stress on the relationship, it isn’t the only issue that can be a catalyst for divorce. If you and your spouse are very different with regard to spending and saving, it can easily start a fight, and with enough time and fuel added to the fire, one starts filing for a divorce. Because of how important financial stability is in this world, it makes a lot of sense that when spouses don’t see eye-to-eye, it can tear relationships apart, regardless of how shallow it may seem.
  1. Inability to resolve conflicts. It is an unrealistic expectation to think that you and your spouse will never fight or have disagreements. They are a part of any relationship, but what is vital to the success of a relationship is the ability to deal with any issues in a positive, constructive manner. What makes a married couple different from a regular, friendly relationship, is that there are feelings involved, and that causes the resentments to become emotionally charged, complicating the entire situation. Being able to successfully resolve conflicts in the marriage is a big step in guaranteeing a long, happy marriage.

What Information Is Public If I File For Divorce

Wednesday, April 13th, 2016

Going through a divorce is not something we want to broadcast. Sometimes it’s not something we want people to know about, and frankly, it’s no one else’s business to a certain extent. And although there are significant confidentiality rules in place, the fact of the matter is, divorce files are public records and therefore, are available to anyone, at any time.

Due to the Freedom of Information laws that have been passed, these files can be accessed by anyone without the need for a real reason for viewing them, and furthermore, can be searched on the internet. Ultimately, the only true way to keep your most personal information private is to simply not have them on record in the first place. Yes, divorce often delves into very private and sensitive information and topics, but that doesn’t mean it has to be completely exposed.

In the end, some of the information that goes public includes but not limited to financial information, property settlement agreements, and psych evaluations if there is a custody battle. However, it is often what is not true, yet still remains on the record, that can be the most damaging. Deliberately false, and wild accusations still make their way to the record and can be just as easily manipulated and used against one of the parties as any other piece of information.

How to Protect Yourself During Divorce

Sunday, April 3rd, 2016

Although the divorce process can be mentally and emotionally draining, it is important to remember that you are in a rather vulnerable position and that you should immediately protect yourself, your children and your personal finances as the divorce carries on. It is incredibly important to take precaution and begin taking steps to guard your personal information and well-being.

Here are a few reasonable steps you should take to protect yourself and the important things around you:

If there are kids involved, make sure your spouse does not just take them if they are choosing to leave the family home. But if you are the one leaving, which in some cases is important to recognize that it may be best for everyone if you do so, you have to have a pre-planned agreement in regards to how much time each parent will have with the child. Although this agreement may not be the same as the one that will be in place after the custody battles are finished, it protects your relationship with your kids.

As soon as you know that you and your spouse are getting divorced, retain an attorney. Once it is clear that you and your soon-to-be-ex cannot settle outside of court, you will need a lawyer to represent you in court. Do not try to represent yourself in a divorce.

If you and your spouse have any joint credit card accounts, cancel them at once. Ideally, you should do this with both parties aware of the credit card cancellation, but you would rather cancel the card before they can charge substantial amounts of credit and leave you with the debt.

Cut down on spending. You may have now gone from a 2-person income family to now being completely dependent on yourself. Less money coming in means that less should be going out, especially since you don’t know how your finances will look when everything has been settled.

Last, but certainly not the least, if anything physical happens between you and your spouse in the realm of domestic violence, call the police immediately. You should definitely file a report, and perhaps even seek a restraining order because it may not be only you who is in harm’s way, but your children as well.